Friday, April 10, 2020

Funny Friday


Good morning (or afternoon/evening, depending upon where you are) this Good Friday, good Byters!

Yes, it’s Easter Friday, aka Good Friday.

Although it is commonly thought that Good Friday is a corruption of "God Friday", similar to the correct description of "goodbye" as a contraction of "God be with you", this is wide of the Mark, Matthew, Luke and John.  Ha ha.  In fact, "Good Friday" comes from the obsolete meaning of the word ”good” as "pious, holy".  The adjective “good” traditionally designates a day on (or sometimes a season in) which religious observance is held. The Oxford English Dictionary states that "good" in this context refers to "a day or season observed as holy by the church", hence the greeting "good tide" at Christmas or on Shrove Tuesday. In addition to Good Friday, there is also a less well-known Good Wednesday, namely the Wednesday before Easter.

Whether you think of it as Good Friday, God’s Friday or just Plain Friday, this holy season has been a bit of a pisser worldwide, hence it is important that this is another form of Friday, namely Funny Friday.  Hopefully the items today will bring a smile, perhaps a chuckle, maybe even a belly laugh, in what is presently a grim and melancholy world.

Be warned, though, risque content lies ahead.


Today’s Funny Friday presents something different, although I have posted on the topic previously.  It is another “F” word: Furtling. 

Furtling comes from the Latin word “furtivus”, which means hidden, and consists of the use of one’s hands to simulate or create the impression of anatomical features in a postcard or photograph.  It was a popular Victorian parlour game in the days before TV and radio.  The photos or pictures are of normal people who are then unintentionally exposing their private parts.

Funny isn’t it, that the same age that gave us a synonym for prudishness (Victorian morality, attitudes etc) and saw all sorts of modest protocols, was at the same time obsessed with matters sexual.  But that’s a topic for a future Bytes post.

As I said, I have posted on the topic of furtling some time ago.  I came across it again recently and discovered more furtles (I assume that’s the noun), so the post which follows is an amplified and revised treatment of the subject.



Quite some years ago, while browsing in Bob Gould's Book Emporium, I came across a marvellous book called “The Naughty Victorian Hand Book.” It was subtitled “Furtling: The Rediscovered Art of Erotic Hand Manipulation”.

There are two pages to each furtle, one which shows how to position one’s hand underneath a diagram with an exposed space, the other the previous page which is then laid over the first.

Furtling was commonly used for entertainment purposes rather than overt sexual gratification.  Amazing, though, how the fingers and hand positions can create risqué anatomical images.  Even young hands can have old looking creases when closed, varying appearances can be incorporated in ways that suit.

Unfortunately I no longer have that book but following are images of Furtling, both from the book mentioned above and from other sources:



On their first date, Joe took Rose to the carnival. When he asked her what she wanted to do first, Rose replied, "Get weighed." 

So Joe took her to the man with the scale who guesses your weight. He looked at Rose and said, "One hundred and twenty pounds." Since Rose weighed in at one seventeen, she collected a prize. 

Next they went on the roller coaster. When the ride was finished, Joe asked Rose what she wanted to do next. "Get weighed," she said. So they went back to the man with the scale, who of course guessed Rose's weight correctly. Leaving without a prize, they went for a ride on the merry-go-round. After they got off, Joe asked Rose what she wanted to do next. "I want to get weighed!" she said again. 

Now Joe began to think this girl was quite strange, and decided to end the evening quickly. He left her at the door with a quick handshake. 

Rose's roommate was waiting up for her return and asked how the evening went. 

"Wousy!" Rose replied. 


From moi . . . 

Okay God, you’re being too tough,
It’s Easter, an end to Covid and stuff.
No health, jobs and money,
It’s no longer funny,
We’ve been quite coronaed enough.

(I am indebted to my wife Kate for coining the term “coronaed” to describe not only being infected or testing positive but the whole Covid-19 scene.)



My friend keeps saying "Cheer up man, it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."
I know he means well.


My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but he wasn’t given the gold medal.
The Chinese authorities refuse to recognize Ty won.


I saw an advert that read "Radio for sale, $1.00, volume stuck of full"
I thought, "I can't turn that down"


Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One looks at the other and says: "Does this taste funny to you?"


I thought my wife was joking when she said she'd leave me if i didn’t stop singing 'I'm a believer'...
Then I saw her face.

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