Monday, February 4, 2019

Brett’s Monthly and Brass Monkey Weather


Brett’s Monthly: 

It’s that time again when Brett sends his monthly list of bizarre and unique calendar holidays, this time for February 2019. 

Click on the daily ones to expand. 

Thanks, Brett. 

  • American Heart Month
  • An Affair to Remember Month
  • Black History Month
  • Canned Food Month
  • Creative Romance Month
  • Great American Pie Month
  • National Bird Feeding Month
  • National Cherry Month
  • National Children’s Dental Health Month
  • National Grapefruit Month
  • National Weddings Month
Weekly Celebrations:
3rd Week International Flirting Week

February 2019 Daily Holidays, Special and Wacky Days:
Bubble Gum Day - first Friday of the month
Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day - first Saturday of month
Superbowl Sunday - Superbowl 53, date varies
The Day the Music Died - Buddy Holly, Richie Valens and the Big Bopper died in a plane crash in 1959.
Chinese New Years - date varies
Send a Card to a Friend Day - obviously created by a card company
Boy Scout Day - celebrates the birthday of scouting
Kite Flying Day - in the middle of winter!?!
11 Clean out Your Computer Day - second Monday of Month
15 Candlemas - on the Julian Calendar
18 President's Day - third Monday of month
23 Open That Bottle Night - last Saturday of month
24 Oscar Night - date varies
26 National Pistachio Day - it's a nutty day!
27 No Brainer Day - this day is for me!
28 National Tooth Fairy Day - and/or August 22

Brass Monkey Weather:

In Australia we have been experiencing record heat wave conditions at the same time as the US is recording freakish cold temperatures and conditions, prompting President Trump to tweet: 
In the beautiful Midwest, windchill temperatures are reaching minus 60 degrees, the coldest ever recorded. In coming days, expected to get even colder. People can’t last outside even for minutes. What the hell is going on with Global Warming? Please come back fast, we need you! 
The US midwest has been hit by what is called a polar vortex, a band of strong winds high in the atmosphere that keeps bitterly cold air locked around the Arctic region. This year the polar vortex drifted south, causing wind-chill temperatures down to record-breaking lows. 

Punxsutawney Phil emerged from his burrow in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania on February 2, Groundhog Day (see Brett’s Monthly, above) and did not see his shadow, meaning spring is coming early, according to the legend. 


Experts are predicting problems for when the thaw comes.

Meanwhile, the town of Hell in Michigan has frozen over. Hell is about an hour’s drive west of Detroit, tucked between the four Great Lakes — Superior, Michigan, Huron and Erie — to the east of Chicago and west of Toronto. 


Some pics of the cold:
A  wheel mould.

Minnesota: What is left when the tank explodes.

Chicago: This is what came off the inside of the car door.

Throwing boiling water in the air.  Shirtless, duh.

Chicago: Maybe a little too al dente.

Indiana:  Fireman at fatal house fire.

Chicago: Commuter train tracks set on fire to warm them to keep the trains running.

The antifreeze froze.

This is what you get when you blow bubbles in freezing weather.


Minnesota.  Someone commented that the pants look angry.

Frozen chicken eggs

Freezing of internal walls...

...and freezing of internal doors.

The cold is even lifting the paint off cars.

Followiing on from the above, I can't resist including the supposedly true answer to an exam question . . .
Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term:
"Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof."
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.  One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.  So, we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving.  I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.  Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.  Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added.  This gives two possibilities.
1)  If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2)  Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it ?  If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Therese Banyan during my Freshman year that "It will be a cold night in Hell before I sleep with you,"  and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then (2) cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic.
The student got the only A.
BTW: debunks that this is a true exam answer, see:
but it is fun anyway.

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