Sunday, March 31, 2024





5 facts about 5 past TV shows. . . 




Some of the cast served in the military:
Alda (Hawkeye Pierce) was in the Army Reserve for six months in Korea.
Jamie Farr (Max Klinger) enlisted, and was stationed in Japan when Red Skelton requested his services on his USO Tour through Korea.
Wayne Rogers (Trapper John McIntyre) joined the U.S. Navy for a time as a ship navigator.
Mike Farrell (B.J. Hunnicut) served in the U.S. Marine Corps.

The episode “Abyssinia, Henry” ends on one of the saddest moments that I have ever seen on TV. Colonel Henry Blake having received an honorable discharge, leaves for home. Radar enters the operating theatre ungowned and without a mask. Hawk yells to him to put on a mask. A stunned and distraught Radar tells everyone that he has received a message: Colonel Blake’s plane was shot down over the Sea of Japan, there were no survivors.

See the scene by clicking on:

Until M*A*S*H, whenever an actor left a television show, they’d be written off in a way that could be temporary. M*A*S*H changed that.

The main actors were shown the final page of the script, with Colonel Blake’s death, just before filming the scene. All the extras, however, had genuine shock when his death was announced.

M*A*S*H ran for 11 years, 11 seasons (1972 – 1983), telling the story of Army doctors and nurses dealing with the Korean War. The actual war lasted three years, one month, and two days,

Alan Alda co-wrote and directed 31 episodes of the series, being the first person to ever win an Emmy for acting, directing, and writing on the same program.

That 31 count includes the series finale - around 106 million viewers tuned in to watch the MASH finale, making it the most-watched TV episode of all time. It kept that record for 25 years until Super Bowl XLIV surpassed it.

A few minutes after MASH's final episode, "Goodbye, Farewell And Amen," many New Yorkers headed straight to the bathroom. In fact, according to UPI, approximately one million people in New York went to the toilet at the same time, as the city's sewers were flooded with 6.7 million gallons of water at once. According to the city's Department of Environmental Protection at the time, the flow rate in the water tunnels leapt by 150 million gallons at around 11:03 pm, exactly three minutes after the finale finished.

A number of stars got their break on M*A*S*H. Ron Howard played an underage Marine. Leslie Nielsen played a Colonel. Patrick Swayze portrayed an injured soldier with leukemia. John Ritter, Laurence Fishburne, Pat Morita, Rita Wilson, George Wendt, Shelley Long, Ed Begley Jr., Blythe Danner, Teri Garr, and even Andrew Dice Clay also all visited the 4077th.

Robert Alda, Alan Alda’s father appeared in two episodes of M*A*S*H as Doctor Anthony B. Borelli, a visiting surgeon and Civilian Medical consultant (seasons 3 and 8). He portrayed George Gershwin in the 1945 biopic Rhapsody in Blue, where he had a female love interest. It was never mentioned that Gershwin was gay.




“Bonanza” was a hit TV show, a western series telling the story of the Cartwright family, that premiered in 1959 and ran for over 14 years. When it finished in 1973, Bonanza’s 14 seasons and 440 episodes made it the second-longest-running western in broadcast history, after Gunsmoke.

In this era, TV shows were typically 30 minutes in length. Producer David Dortort wanted to change this, and asked that the show get rid of the 30 minute length and move to one hour. His reasoning was he wanted more time to get in depth with the characters and thought an hour would be better suited for the task. Typically fathers in sitcoms at this time were portrayed as bumblers, with the wives being the responsible ones, Dortort wished to change that.

The Cartwrights were an all-male family headed by Ben (played by Lorne Greene), thrice a widower with a son from each marriage: Adam (Pernell Roberts), Hoss (Dan Blocker), and Little Joe (Michael Landon).

Roberts left Bonanza in 1965, but the popularity of the show, now with only two sons, remained undiminished. However, the unexpected death of Blocker in 1972 left a bigger hole, and Bonanza ended one season later.

Dortort envisioned Bonanza as an Old West presentation of the legend of King Arthur. Ben Cartwright was King Arthur and his sons were his knights.

Most of the show's actors created musical albums, and all four Cartwrights sang in a 1964 album called "Christmas at the Ponderosa." Greene was especially successful in this field, and his single "Ringo" was a huge hit in the US and Canada.

Hear them sing by clicking on:


Wanted: Dead or Alive


Western television series Wanted: Dead or Alive ran from 1958 to 196. A switch to Wednesday nights for the third season opposite the established “Ozzie and Harriet” on ABC and the color “Price Is Right” on NBC caused “Wanted…” to falter, dropping below the Top 25, and it was canceled

The Mare's Leg weapon carried by Josh Randall (Steve McQueen) is a cut down Winchester model 1892 carbine in 44-40 caliber, but the bullets in his cartridge belt are 45-70 caliber rounds used in the larger, more powerful rifles of the day. The producers wanted to use the 45-70s because they were more visually impressive than the relatively small, pistol sized rounds actually used in the 1892 carbine. The use of the 1892 carbine is itself an anachronism as the series is set in the 1870s.

You can buy a working model of the Mare's Leg today for about a grand. Rifle manufacturer Henry currently sells three iterations of the Mare's Leg as a .44 for $975, inspired by the Western series.


After getting offered the chance to star in The Magnificent Seven (1960), McQueen found out that the only way he could do the film, which was being shot simultaneously with "Wanted: Dead or Alive", was to fake an accident or illness and get a medical leave from the series. According to his first wife, Neile, McQueen accomplished this feat by "faking" a car crash in which he merely crashed his car into a tree, receiving minor cuts, muscle pulls, and bruises, and getting his medical leave. The series' production went on temporary hiatus while McQueen filmed "The Magnificent Seven".

Initially, the creators of the series had a hard time selling the show because bounty hunters were thought to be unsavory characters and have been portrayed as such in numerous western shows and movies. The creators overcame this obstacle by having Josh Randall give most, sometimes ALL, of his earnings to help people such as the families of people murdered by the men Randall brings in, thus making Randall a sympathetic and likable character.

After a blazing big screen career, McQueen died at 50 of cancer November 7, 1980, with his third wife and two children at his side.


The Fugitive


The series (1963 – 1967) tells the story of Dr. Richard Kimble who is accused as the murderer of his wife, tried and convicted. On his way to be executed, he escapes. The only chance to prove his innocence is to find the man who killed his wife. Kimble, pursued by Lt. Gerard, risks his life several times when he shows his identity to help other people out of trouble.

This was the first series to feature a "final episode" in which all the plot lines were resolved, and all questions answered.

While originally conceived as a modern-day western, many plot points were also taken from Victor Hugo's Les MisΓ©rables. Like Jean Valjean, Richard Kimble is on the run from the law, and must frequently change locales to stay free. His pursuer, Gerard, is both inspired by, and named after, Inspector Javert.

The show appears to be based on the Samuel Sheppard murder case of 1954. While the show does feature some similarities to the case, Roy Huggins consistently denied that he based Richard Kimble on Sheppard, or the fictional murder on the real one. Claiming that he was unfamiliar with the Sheppard case until the series began, he said the show was actually influenced by his love for Westerns, and he wanted to do a series about a modern character roaming around the country, in a similar fashion to a mythic cowboy.

Sam Sheppard was an American neurosurgeon. He was convicted of the 1954 murder of his pregnant wife, Marilyn Reese Sheppard, but the conviction was eventually overturned by the U.S. Supreme Court, which cited a "carnival atmosphere" at the trial. Sheppard was acquitted at a retrial in 1966.

Barry Morse had said that on more than one occasion, he was accosted by elderly ladies in supermarkets, telling him to "leave that nice Dr. Kimble alone", telling him that a one-armed man is the true killer.


Happy Days


Happy Days is an American television sitcom that aired first-run on the ABC network from January 15, 1974, to July 19, 1984, with a total of 255 half-hour episodes spanning 11 seasons. Created by Garry Marshall, it was one of the most successful series of the 1970s. The series presented an idealized vision of life in the 1950s and early 1960s Midwestern United States, and it starred Ron Howard as Richie Cunningham, Henry Winkler as his friend Fonzie, and Tom Bosley and Marion Ross as Richie's parents, Howard and Marion Cunningham.

Although Fonzie loved motorcycles, Henry Winkler was terrified of them. Most of the scenes of Fonzie riding the motorcycle were shot with the bike attached to a platform, and being pulled by a truck.

Many fans agree that the show's quality deteriorated after the three-part season 5 opener, "Hollywood", where Fonzie jumps a shark while water-skiing. Today, when a show takes a sharp drop in quality, has strayed from its original premise beyond the point of no return, or has writers insert desperate attempts for ratings, it's said to have "jumped the shark".

Its ratings were so low at the end of its second season (and first full season) that it came close to being cancelled. Then Henry Winkler's "Fonzie" character started to catch on with viewers, the ratings took a turn for the better, and the show wound up running another nine years.

In the final episode, Tom Bosley stepped out of character and turned to the camera thanking the viewers for being part of the Cunningham family for the many years the show had been on.

Saturday, March 30, 2024





In 2012 architect Hannes Coudenys began documenting quirky and ugly buildings in his native Belgium. These pics he posted on an Instagram account and a Facebook site called 'Ugly Belgian Houses” He is still doing so.

Some of those pics and reader comments have been posted in Bytes previously.

Asked in an interview why he thought Belgium in particular seemed to produce such eccentric architecture, he replied:
“The Dutch have been ruling us, France has been ruling us, we have always had to be brave little Belgians. We were finally being set free and subsidized to do what we want. After school, you find a girl, you get married, and you build your own house, and it’s not OK for it to look like the neighbours’ houses.”
I suppose that’s as good an explanation as any.

Here are some more recent pics from Hannes Courdenys’ Facebook page with  reader comments, at:


I love it. Construction humour

Ladies and Gentlemen, the corner has left the building!

Cutting corners..

Tetris style

I suppose it seemed funny when they came up with it, after a few too many glasses of wine. They should have scrapped it the next morning though. It looks like a building shitting out a letter box.

They needed the bricks to support the letter box 🀣

Let's talk about the windows as well...

It certainly raises a point.

☝️ yeah, or pointing at imminent danger from the sky ☝️

Aren't there enough bunkers in the cow fields and on the coast?

Magic eye

This is a beautiful house.

I see many new modern houses in Belgian, but that here looks really weird

Was this built in the famous Belgium red brick famine?

It kinda feels like he’s giving you ‘the finger’… 🀷🏼‍♀️

Interesting. I think the house on the right is uglier.

it raises its middle finger to the architect who designed the house

I like it.

I rather think it looks like a crematorium chimney... πŸ™ˆ

Why cutting the one tree of the garden like this ? They are afraid of shade ?

Is that a chimney, or are you just happy to see me?

The question is: why have you tortured those poor trees?

And the owners cannot even be bothered to clean the dirty façade...

Everyone loves a crenellated rampart.

A Belgianman's home is his castle.

Is it against the zombies?

Lego house

All these houses look like it is photoshopped. If it’s real…..🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

Is this an iceberg house? Most of it underground? Are the lego on the top air vents? What are Belgian architects "on" so I can avoid it πŸ˜‹

When you absolutely, without a doubt, want none of your furniture to fit.

I really like it.

The only one who understood the concept of the house was the person that designed and installed the gate. Great job!

The architect designed the gate to create the art of suggestion.

This is a thing of beauty.

I wanna live there

Tetris, 1 second before Game Over

When the architect is a fan of origami but also has to please a Star Trek enthusiast, you get this masterpiece.

Why does Belgium do this sort of thing?

Maybe this is the house with the most unusable spaces...

I like this! And you don't know how it looks inside !

Is this the result of crazy urbanisation rules?

Left is a garage . Cannot be built higher and so the house on top needs to be as large as possible or there is no room inside , probably only achievable like this. Often the changes need to be made at the last moment when it is too late to change the rest of the design

What worries me is that it has no windows... If I were a cop, I'd definitely find excuses to look up there...

it may have a window at the back, or a skylight (though only a skylight would be really weird).

Despite the “welcome” sign, I would be very hesitant to get in.

This is where they keep their kidnap victims. Not basement people, not subtle either.

It's a home cinema! Or a sex dungeon. One or the other πŸ˜‚

Comes with own breathing machine

House is angry

That looks like they reused a steam train shed

What you think you have stepped on when you’ve stepped on a Lego

Windows encountered an unexpected error 🀣

Well, aside from the dodgy half-roof-half-wall windows it's actually not bad.

It looks like 3 separate homes squished together.

This is what makes Belgium unique ! Rather common ...

Actually kinda like this one

Well at least the house on the right has solar panels 😎

Hello brother from another mother.

In the house on the right is where my grandparents used to live, the picture here is made in 1979 for comparison 😁

It's not photoshopped, it's belgiumed.

Funny thing is.. it’s no exception. you see this everywhere in Belgium.

This just screams for a little 'Welcome in Belgium' logo

Quite classy, for Belgium

No it's real. I live in Belgium. There 's a lot more houses like these

I see a lot of old houses in Belgium, looking that way

Cut on the dotted line.

The car on the left doesn't fit with the house.

Some more without comments . . .





A lengthy read for the Easter weekend . . .

I was watching clips and acts of Woodstock, or the Woodstock Music and Art Fair to give it its proper name, held in 1969. One of the highlights for me has always been the address given to the crowd by Max Yasgur, the owner of farm where the event was held.

Following is more information about Max Yasgur and the circumstances.

Max Yasgur at Woodstock in 1969

Max Yasgur:

Yasgur was born in Manhattan, New York City to Jewish immigrants and was raised with his brother on the family's farm, where his parents also ran a small hotel. By the late 1960s, he was the largest milk producer in Sullivan County, New York his farm having 650 cows.


The Venue:

Woodstock’s organisers were four men in their who had originally had the idea to hold a music festival at Howard Mills Industrial Park in Wallkill, N.Y., about 30 miles from the town of Woodstock. About a month before the festival was to occur, the town succeeded in banning the event. Having been rejected by other potential venues, they were running out of options.

Event organisers were contacted by a resident of nearby Bethel, who thought the town could offer an option. A meeting was organised by a local real estate agent to see a dairy farm and to meet the farm’s owner, Max Yasgur. Yasgur then aged 49 with a heart condition, agreed to lease some of his land to festival organisers.

Although reports of the sum paid vary, including that he was paid between $50,000 and $75,000, his reasons for doing so were both financial and idealistic.

According to his son Sam Yasgur, his father agreed to rent the field to the festival organisers because it was a very wet year, which curtailed hay production. The income from the rental would offset the cost of purchasing thousands of bales of hay.

Yasgur was a conservative Republican who supported the Vietnam War but nonetheless strongly believed in the right of free expression, even if the expression came from people whose lifestyles and beliefs were very different to his own. He once remarked to the New York Times that, “If the generation gap is to be closed, we older people have to do more than we have done.”

Local Reaction:

Though not everyone in Yasgur’s town was anti-Woodstock, there were many who had no interest in closing any “generation gap.”

Soon after news of his letting part of his farm became known, he began to receive both threatening and supporting phone calls (which could not be placed without the assistance of an operator because the community of White Lake, New York, where the telephone exchange was located, still utilised manual switching). Some of the calls threatened to burn him out. Signs were erected around town, saying, "Local People Speak Out Stop Max's Hippie Music Festival", "No 150,000 hippies here", and "Don’t buy Yasgur’s milk".

The threat of boycott actually hardened Yasgur’s resolve. His wife, Miriam Yasgur, recalled how, after her husband saw this sign, she “knew darned well he was going to let them have their festival.”

Yasgur and Woodstock:

Yasgur has stated that he did not expect the festival to be as big as it was. It is estimated that between 460,000 and 500,000 people attended.

He provided food at cost or for free. When he heard that some local residents were selling water to people coming to the concert, he put a large sign on the side of his barn that faced the road to inform everyone that he had “Free Water.” The New York Times reported that Yasgur "slammed a work-hardened fist on the table and demanded of some friends, 'How can anyone ask money for water?'" His son Sam recalled his father telling his children to "take every empty milk bottle from the plant, fill them with water and give them to the kids, and give away all the milk and milk products we had at the dairy."

Yasgur’s address:

On the third day of the festival, just before Joe Cocker's early afternoon set, Yasgur addressed the crowd:
"I'm a farmer. I don't know how to speak to 20 people at one time, let alone a crowd like this. But I think you people have proven something to the world — not only to the Town of Bethel, or Sullivan County, or New York State; you've proven something to the world. This is the largest group of people ever assembled in one place. We have had no idea that there would be this size group, and because of that you've had quite a few inconveniences as far as water, food, and so forth. Your producers have done a mammoth job to see that you're taken care of... they'd enjoy a vote of thanks. But above that, the important thing that you've proven to the world is that a half a million kids — and I call you kids because I have children that are older than you are — a half million young people can get together and have three days of fun and music and have nothing but fun and music, and I – God bless you for it!"
Watch and hear his address by clicking on:


After Woodstock:

Many of Yasgur's neighbours turned against him after the festival, and he was no longer welcome at the town general store, but he never regretted his decision to allow the concert on his farm. The local postmaster reportedly turned against the Yasgurs, so they opted to change their address from Bethel to Cochecton, another nearby town.

In 1970 he was sued by his neighbours for property damage caused by the concert attendees. They charged that large numbers of concertgoers used their property as a site of shelter and defecation and left their property strewn with refuse.

The damage to Yasgur’s own property was far more extensive and, over a year later, he received a $50,000 settlement to pay for the near-destruction of his dairy farm.

Until the end of his life, Yasgur avoided discussion about the treatment he had received from anti-Woodstock neighbours.

He refused to rent out his farm for a 1970 revival of the festival, saying, "As far as I know, I'm going back to running a dairy farm".

Yasgur, who had already suffered a series of heart attacks before Woodstock, sold his farm in 1971 and relocated to Florida, where he died of a heart attack in 1973. Rolling Stone then paid tribute to him with a full-page obituary — a rare gesture for a non-musician.

Joni Mitchell; Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young:

Joni Mitchell's song "Woodstock", made famous by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, has a line about "going down to Yasgur's Farm". Joni Mitchell Wrote it in response to Graham Nash’s description of the events at Woodstock. Mitchell’s version is melodic and thoughtful, while the Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young version focuses on harmonies and is more up-tempo.

Well, I came upon a child of God
He was walking along the road
And I asked him, "tell me, where are you going?"
This he told me

Said, "I'm going down to Yasgur's Farm
Gonna join in a rock and roll band
Got to get back to the land
And set my soul free"

Crosby, Stills, Nash version:

Jonii Mitchell version:
“I wrote a little song for my friends to sing.”



By the way #1:

There is a very watchable movie telling the story of Woodstock as a backdrop: Taking Woodstock.


By the way #2:

On August 21, 1969, Max Yasgur wrote an impassioned letter to the Editor of the Sullivan County Democrat regarding the Woodstock Festival:
“Three weeks ago the citizens of Wallkill, NY banished from their community a group of young people seeking three days of music and peace. In desperation looking for a site on which to hold their festival Woodstock Ventures came to Bethel. For two weeks it rained daily while the young people toiled around the clock in an almost impossible effort to turn hay fields into a Festival site. A playground was constructed for children, complete with animals, miles of chain link fence was erected, a magnificent stage was built, five wells were drilled, electric service was brought in from five miles away, thousands of portable toilets were positioned and generally every effort possible was made to handle a maximum expected turnout of 50,000 people per day.

The young people who built Aquarian began allaying the fears of the local people with whom they had contact. They were industrious, polite and policed up after themselves. On the eve of the Festival, however, adults and nature combined to form a severe test of pressure and problems or the Aquarian Festival. NYC Police Commissioner Howard Leary prevented an estimated 350 off duty police from serving as security officers as they had originally been hired to do.

One hundred buses which had been scheduled to shuttle in festival patrons free of charge from outlying parking lots were suddenly unavailable. Then finally the rains came. So did the young people. Eight or ten times as many people came as had ever been anticipated.

Under the severe strain of almost one half million people the facilities broke down. Parking in the rain soaked fields became impossible. Traffic, with an under-staged security force, became an impossible snarl. The wells, over taxed, were hardly able to keep up with the demand and the sanitation facilities became inaccessible to maintenance. By the early morning hours of Saturday I feared that major catastrophe was in the making. I tried to imagine what a population larger than Albany and perhaps as large as Buffalo might do in a situation in which they were wet, thirsty, tired and immobile and facing nothing but more of the same. The prospects were horrifying. Some had come over 3,000 miles and had paid $18.00 for tickets only to find they had to walk the last five miles in the rain to reach an over full Festival site where no tickets were being collected because the management feared someone might be hurt in the crush at the gate. What would you envisage that a group of a half a million professional football or other sport fans might do under similar circumstances.

But, thank heaven, none of our fears were realized. What happened at Bethel this past weekend was that these young people together with our local residents turned the Aquarian Festival into a dramatic victory for the spirit of peace, good will and human kindness. Hungry youths shared everything they had. Local residents poured out to volunteer food and aid. Well meaning youths looking for a place to rest and something to eat strayed onto private property, built fires out of fences and slept in fields. My neighbors were magnificent. They had nothing to gain from the festival. They were not receiving rent or selling anything. They were merely trying to run their dairy farms and homes. They woke to find thousands of young people camping on their lawns and fields. Yet, through it all there was not one incident as my neighbors, for whom my heart goes out more than they can know, rose to the occasion. The State Police, Sheriff Ratner and his overworked force, local police and volunteers from surrounding communities justly received the highest possible praise from Festival goers, staff and local residents. Together they organized emergency traffic and medical procedures that finally succeeded in bringing order out of the traffic and relief to the inundated first aid facilities. With the aid of Armed Forces helicopters and local volunteers a potential medical crisis was averted. They deserve the highest possible commendation, each and every one, for the tireless and magnificent way in which they handled the situation.

I am of course exceedingly sorry for my many neighbors and friends who suffered damage. The fault, if there be one, lies simply in the fact that ten times as many youths came to the festival as had been anticipated and of course the rain then made a bad situation terrible. But damage is repairable by money and effort.

In the final analysis, however, the material aspects of Aquarian, such as a local loss of revenue at the track and the monumental inconvenience to local residents are far less important than the lesson that was to be learned.

It seems evident to me that if one-half million young people came to Sullivan County there must be fifteen to twenty million of them in America. It has been stated that 80% were on some form of narcotics. Although this is merely a guess and not a proven fact if it is so the problem is more urgent than any of us realized.

The militant groups and the communist organizers were here and nothing would have proved their point more than a riot. But they couldn’t get a riot started no matter how they tried because, as the young people said, this was a cool scene with no reason for violence. I for one have learned a lesson that I will not forget.

I realize that as an American we are talking about most of our generation of young people, many of whom are the young intelligentsia of our society. Many of them are attending college, many have graduate degrees and the one thing that they have in common is that they are all thinkers. Possibly some are impractical dreamers but all are thinkers and deeply concerned about their future. I as an American am also concerned about the future of America and the form of government I love.

These young people, whom my age group refer to as the beat generation are the voters and the lawmakers of tomorrow. If they are a beat generation then we, the so-called establishment, their parents, made them so. Our generation will have to decide and decide quickly whether we are going to give these young people a fair shake or are going to discount them because they don? cut their hair or wear their clothes the way we do. If we don’t listen to their gripes the radical and extremist will and then we can and will have continued anarchy and violence in America.

It has been stated and undoubtedly greatly overstated that 80% of the festival visitors were on some form of narcotics. If these figures are even partly true it is clear that the basic problem is the climate in our country which makes such facts possible. Whether or not those who are now using drugs can be helped is primarily a medical problem. But the problem of preventing further drug use is the problem that my generation must face. If we want our young people to be free of the horrible effects of drug addiction then we must provide for them a climate in which they can grow without being forced to drugs to avoid our society.

It was proven in Bethel that these young people don’t want to follow all the radical groups that are pressuring them. In Bethel, in spite of terrible adversity one half million people remained peaceful and I believe that they and the millions of others like them would like to become part of a peaceful society with us. But, if we don’t welcome them, if we don’t give them a fair shake, if we don’t listen to their complaints and try to reason out the solutions with them what choice will they have? The radical groups will listen to their complaints and will make efforts for them. If we close the doors into our society they will only be left with choosing the radicals. As the late Robert F. Kennedy realized, “it is with these young people that we share this nation and with them that our form of government must be run.” But if we exclude them it will be our blame for having forced them to the anarchy of the radicals.

If a half million young people at the Aquarian Festival could turn such adverse conditions, filled with the possibility of disaster, riot, looting and catastrophe into three days of music and peace then perhaps there is hope that if we join with them we can turn those adversities that are the problems of America today into a hope for a brighter and more peaceful future.


Thursday, March 28, 2024




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Hello Byters and readers.

Some Easter humour today, hopefully no one will be offended, there is nothing in the following that, I believe, is offensive.


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Jesus was born on Christmas, died on Good Friday and rose on Easter.

What are the odds?!?!

Some comments by people in response to the above on the website where it was posted:

You think that's something?
Lou Gehrig died of Lou Gehrig's disease.

Ok but who is buried in Grant's tomb?

I told my wife that I have the same birthday as Adolf Hitler.
She said, "It's crazy to think that such a loathsome figure, who ruined the lives of so many people, shares the same birthday as Adolf Hitler."

I often stop and wonder at Fate’s peculiar ways, how almost all our famous men were born on holidays.

Easter was cancelled today - cops finally found the body.

I remember being a kid and my parents filling my head with nonsense, like Santa, the Easter bunny and the Tooth Fairy.

Well now that I’m older I don’t fall for that rubbish anymore, thank God.

A rooster wakes up early Easter Sunday morning. He sticks his head out of the chicken coop, and sees all these multicoloured eggs all over the barnyard. He takes a look at the eggs, takes a look at the hens, takes another look at the eggs, takes one more look at the hens, he thinks about it for a minute, then he walks across the barnyard and kicks the shit out of the peacock.

A man was the only Protestant in a large Catholic neighbourhood. Every Friday during Lent, while his neighbours were eating cold fish, he was in his backyard grilling a steak.

They couldn't stand the temptation. So, they decided to try to convert him to Catholicism. He finally agreed.

A priest came over, sprinkled water on his head, said “You were born a Baptist, you were raised a Baptist. Now you're a Catholic.”

The next year, on the first Friday of Lent they smelled the same smell.

They rushed to his house. He was in his backyard sprinkling water over his steak saying “You were born a cow, you were raised a cow, but now you're a fish.”

Why don’t the circus lions eat the clowns?

Because they taste funny!

Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer

One says "Does this taste funny to you?"

The other responds "No".

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A teacher asks the Easter Sunday School "Why do we celebrate Easter?" Hands go up. "Emily!"

"Easter is when the three wise men came to give baby Jesus gifts" "No, Emily, that is Christmas."

"Who else knows? Bobby! " "Easter is when Jesus gave the loaves and fishes to feed the big crowd."

"No, that is a miracle Bobby." "Who can tell us why we celebrate Easter? Amanda!"

"Easter is the time of year when they put Jesus on a cross and he died and they put him in a tomb."

"Yes! Very good, Amanda!"

"And if Jesus comes out of his tomb and sees his shadow, then we will get six more weeks of winter!"

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When Dick met a young lady from Clare,
He was the first one to get there.
She said “Copulation
Can result in gestation,
But gosh, now you’re there, I don’t care.’

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What do you call it when a German supermarket is all out of sausage and cheese?

A Wurst KΓ€se scenario!

A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after he broke his left arm in a bar fight.

But he still has the right to remain silent.

A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.

"Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

A girl raised her hand and asked "To draw out all his savings?"