Tuesday, July 11, 2023

LEXOPHILIA

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Byter Steve M sent me an email with examples of Lexophilia, which is reprinted below.

Thanks Steve (or maybe not, there are some real groaners there).


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According to Pinterest:

"Lexophilia" is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as:
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.
Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.

According to Wiktionary:
A lexophile is a lover of words, especially in word games, puzzles, anagrams, palindromes, etc.

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Steve’s email:

LEXOPHILIA - WHO ON EARTH DREAMS THESE UP? A lexophile of course!

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

When chemists die, they barium.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro - what a rip off!

Don't worry about old age; it doesn't last.

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According to Proof Communications at:

The New York Times apparently holds an annual lexophile competition to see who can create the best original pun. Furphy or not, it’s all good fun, so take a moment to enjoy these tragic examples of past winners.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

I got some batteries that were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

Police were summoned to a day-care centre where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He’s all right now.

A bicycle can’t stand alone; it’s just two tyred.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine last week is now fully recovered.

A crossed-eyed teacher lost her job. She just couldn’t control her pupils.

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.





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