Monday, March 13, 2023

READER CONTRIBUTION



Sent to me by Leo M.

Thanks, Leo.


Fortunately this bunch come from the good old USA

(No doubt we have a few here) (Mainly in Canberra – any/all of them!)

They Walk Among Us!

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Some guy bought a new fridge for his house.
To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a
Sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.'
For three days the fridge sat there without anyone looking twice.
He eventually decided that people were too mistrustful of this deal.
So he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.'

The next day someone stole it!

They walk amongst us!

-------------------------------------

I stopped at Mc Donald’s and ordered some fries.

The girl behind the counter said “Would you like some fries with that?”

They walk amongst us!

--------------------------

One day I was walking down the beach with
Some friends when someone shouted.....
'Look at that dead bird!'

Someone looked up at the sky and said...'Where?'

They walk among us!

----------------------------------------------------------

While looking at a house, my brother asked the
Estate agent which direction was north because
He didn't want the sun waking him up every morning.

She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?'

My brother explained that the sun rises in the east

And has for some time. She shook her head and said,
'Oh, I don't keep up with all that stuff......'

They Walk Among Us!

--------------------------------------------

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria,
when we overheard an admin girl talking about the
sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach.

She drove down in a convertible, but said
she 'didn't think she'd get sunburned
because the car was moving'.

They Walk Among Us!

------------------------------------

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car
which is designed to cut through a seat belt
if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the car trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

-------------------------------------------------

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area and went to the lost luggage office and reported the loss.
The woman there smiled and told me not to worry
because she was a trained professional and
said I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me,
'Has your plane arrived yet?'...

(I work with professionals like this.)

They Walk Among Us!

------------------------------------------------

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man
ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut 
into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time,
then said 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry
enough to eat 6 pieces.

They Walk Among Us!

------------------------------------------------

A man was driving when he saw the flash of a traffic camera. He figured that his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though he knew that he was not speeding... Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed. Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed. He tried a fourth time with the same result. He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a snail's pace... Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seatbelt..

You can't fix stupid.

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